Aric McKeown

Intrigued by the “real” and “actual” claims of another Facebook application in a sea of useless Facebook applications, I clicked on the My Personality application link to find out who I was.

For those of your who are skeptical, let me put your mind at ease. You are but 20 questions away from unlocking the secrets of the inner you!

What does this “real” application say about my personality? By answering from “Very Inaccurate” to “Very Accurate” we can find out together!

Have a vivid imagination.

Does my imagination act clearly and vigorously? Sure, vut I’m no Walter Mitty. Let’s set that in at a “Moderately Accurate.”

Hold a grudge.

Some asshat stabbed me with a compass in middle school. But I don’t remember his name. Sounds like another “Moderately Accurate.”

Do not mind being the centre of attention.

The URL for the site you are reading is AricMcKeown.com. We’ll give myself a “Very Accurate.”

Do not like poetry.

Do they need the “do not” in there? Then again, who am I to judge this “actual” survey. I don’t love or hate poetry. This is “Neither Inaccurate nor Accurate.”

Complete tasks successfully.

I get out of bed every morning. If they were less vague, I might not be giving it a “Moderately Accurate.”

Believe that others have good intentions.

No one cut me off in traffic this morning, but that doesn’t mean they were wishing me well. “Moderately Inaccurate.”

Avoid philosophical discussions.

Like cracking open this survey? Come on now. That is “Very Inaccurate.”

Need a push to get started.

Yes, with a but. “Moderately Accurate.”

Cut others to pieces.

Metaphorically, I would hope. Otherwise this survey took a disturbing turn. Anywho, not in front of their faces. “Moderately Inaccurate.”

Make friends easily.

I have enough friends, questionnaire. That is “Very Inaccurate.”

Feel comfortable with myself.

Am I answering 20 questions on a social network to find out more about myself? You should be able to answer “Very Inaccurate” for me, “real” application.

Often feel blue.

See above jab at these questions. “Moderately Accurate.”

Am easy to satisfy.

Your survey leaves much to be desired, and thus, that is “Moderately Inaccurate.”

Keep in the background.

Do I mind being the center of attention? I also feel my “cut others to pieces” answer slipping away.

Am always prepared.

I was a Boy Scout. But that was only so I could learn and forget how to tie knots. “Neither Inaccurate nor Accurate.”

Enjoy wild flights of fantasy.

Has anyone ever asked this question of anyone else ever? “Say, Bob, I was wondering if you ever enjoyed wild flights of fantasy. Whoops, there is a fax coming through. Hold that thought.” You got yourself a “Very Inaccurate” answer there. And you are stupid.

Get stressed out easily.

I am complaining about a survey on a social network. “Very Accurate.”

Avoid contact with others.

Oddly enough, “Very Accurate.” Don’t email me about this question, or anything at all. Ever.

Am not easily bothered by things.

Please refer to “Get stressed out easily.”

Shirk my duties.

This survey is being answered at work. “Very Accurate.”

The results are in!

You have antisocial personality disorder. Please note that it is extremely unlikely that a personality disorder is actually present, this is just for fun!

So these “real” and “actual” questions were just for fun, and you weren’t ever planning on giving me a “real” and “actual” answer? Screw your face in half, My Personality Facebook application!